Dreamer

Simple Fact - I am just a dreamer.

What does this mean really? 

Well, I spend hours and hours every day fantasizing.  Not that kind of fantasizing you dirty minded fool - get you mind out of the gutter (okay, that kind of fantasizing does occur but that is not what I am talking about).  I fantasize about everything and anything.  Sure, this may sound like a colossal waste of time to you but it is what keeps me alive.

Copper-bellied Watersnake - one of the snakes I often dream about

I dream about being in a better place mentally.  I dream about having my fit and lean physical body back.  I dream about snakes.  I dream about the Center for Snake Conservation.  I dream about my boys' future successes.  I dream about everything actually.

This makes living in the moment very difficult.  I cannot appreciate what I have now because I want what I see in my dreams.  Relationships suffer because I do not express my gratitude for the moments I spend with people in the present.  My work suffers because I cannot do what is needed at the moment to succeed.  I can only see the future of what will be - not the path of how to get there.

My horoscope this morning spoke directly to me.  [How does this keep happening?  Pretty soon, I am going to have to start believing in astrology.]  I have gotten way off track pursuing my life goal and purpose.  I am no longer pouring myself into my passion - snakes.  

The dream of the Center for Snake Conservation is no longer easy to visualize.  It is hard to see myself back on track and reaching my life's goal.  This cannot happen.  I am a dreamer.  I can dream again about snakes.  I need to believe again and find the people who can help me succeed.  I have lost friends in the my absence.  My credibility has died with many, many people.  I have destroyed relationships that are critical to my success; to the success of the Center for Snake Conservation.  But it is not too late.

My chance is not gone.  The Center for Snake Conservation is who I am.  It means more to me than I care to admit out loud.  I have been devastated by the past year and my behavior (or lack of action).  My credibility is shot but this can be repaired.  The framework for success is still there.  I just need to get back on track and make things work again.

Bringing snakes to people is one of the most rewarding aspects of my passion.

I am a dreamer.  I lost my dreams for a while but I still know how to dream.  I am going to be asking all of you for help in bringing me back to living in the moment while at the same time, letting me (and you) dream big. 

DREAMER - Ozzy Osbourne

Gazing through the window at the world outside
Wondering will mother earth survive
Hoping that mankind will stop abusing her sometime

After all there's only just the two of us
And here we are still fighting for our lives
Watching all of history repeat itself
Time after time

I'm just a dreamer
I dream my life away
I'm just a dreamer
Who dreams of better days

I watch the sun go down like everyone of us
I'm hoping that the dawn will bring a sign
A better place for those Who will come after us ... 
This time

I'm just a dreamer

I dream my life away oh yeah
I'm just a dreamer
Who dreams of better days

Your higher power may be God or Jesus Christ
It doesn't really matter much to me
Without each others help there ain't no hope for us
I'm living in a dream of fantasy
Oh yeah, yeah, yeah

If only we could all just find serenity
It would be nice if we could live as one
When will all this anger, hate and bigotry ... 
Be gone?

I'm just a dreamer
I dream my life away
Today
I'm just a dreamer
Who dreams of better days
Okay
I'm just a dreamer
Who's searching for the way
Today
I'm just a dreamer
Dreaming my life away
Oh yeah, yeah, yeah